When you become an entrepreneur, there are ultimately two roles you take on in the beginning: the leader and the manager. It can be a lonely experience, and you can feel like you do a lot of work without it being noticed. Sound familiar? As moms, we tend to feel the same, don’t we? Not only do we share similar feelings but we can look at our job taking care of our family and home the same ways as an entrepreneur does a business. Let’s be real…it is a business. I like to say that we are moms by identity and Chief Household Officers by job. So, let’s dive in and explore these roles we take on as entrepreneurs of our homes.
The Leader: “I have a dream…”
As moms, we are a leader in our home. We purposefully plan our days, weeks, and months, make decisions about what is best for our family, decide how we will spend our time, and create a schedule for how things will run in our home. Problems occur in this role when we don’t stop to think about what is important to us. What are our values? What is our family’s mission statement? Once we have answers to these questions, we can truly plan with purpose. We can create schedules and routines that make sense to our family. We can plan activities with those who matter to us and do things that help us grow. Without recognizing our role as leaders in the home and taking time out weekly to focus on this role we limit ourselves to only putting out fires on a regular basis. I don’t know about you, but I would like to do more than be a firefighter all day!
The Manager: “Whistle while you work…”
This is the part of being a CHO I find that either moms love or hate. Very few are in the middle. The manager gets the housework done, deals with crises that come, and ultimately puts into action the plans that were made. Just like in the workplace when we have a full inbox that we must attend to or meetings with co-workers that we can’t stand, the tasks of taking care of a home and family can be frustrating. Procrastination creeps up and we feel overwhelmed when we look at all the items we need to do. The couch becomes our friend. This is where the leader’s plan and vision for the family come in to play. If what is important to me is that anyone who comes into my home feels comfortable and welcome, and this includes my partner, my kids, and me, then I want to take care of my home to achieve this goal. I will declutter, clean, and create a space that matches my vision. If my vision for myself is that I am calm and able to handle stress with a clear mind, then as a manager I want to get things done immediately rather than put them off. The manager part of the job is the backbone. Without it, we just have a bunch of ideas and no one getting them done.
What can I do?
You may say, “This sounds good, Katie, but I don’t have a clue where to start.” I understand and you are not alone. I talk to moms on a regular basis who want things to change but don’t know how to find the time or energy to do so. I always say that change happens when you are at your wits end with how things are currently going. With this in mind, I created a 45 day program for full and part-time stay at home moms to learn about their job as a Chief Household Officer and make it work for them. The From Stay at Home Mom to Chief Household Officer program is designed to motivate and support you in being a happier mom and stronger CHO. We also explore issues like feeling unappreciated and taking care of you. Instead of having a pity party about it together, I give you tools to improve how you feel about yourself and what you do. I am watching this program change the way moms think, take action, and on top of that improve relationships in their homes in the process.
Not sure you are ready for a program? I understand. It can be overwhelming to put one more thing on your plate so let me give you some tips to improve your situation now.
- Pick one night this coming week and put it on your calendar as a planning night.
- When the kids are finally in bed, DO NOT sit on your couch. Go straight to a desk or your dining room table with paper and pen.
- Write down what matters to you, what is important to your family, and what you want to change about your current situation.
- Then, start to plan the week in a way that changes what you are unhappy with and focuses on what matters most. Once the week starts, keep this mindset that you want to improve how things are and not stay at status quo.
If you get to the end of that night and have questions, don’t worry! You can write me and ask any question you may have. I encourage you to check out the program at http://fromsahmtocho.com/ and sign up to receive emails with tips and updates. I have free webinars from time to time that support moms in growing as Chief Household Officers. You are doing a great job as a mom! Let me help you rock being a CHO as well!
Katie Rössler is a licensed professional counselor from the United States living in Germany. She has over 10 years experience working with individuals, couples and families on improving their lives and relationships. She also is the creator of the From Stay at Home Mom to Chief Household Officer program (http://fromsahmtocho.com/) which teaches and empowers mothers who stay at home full or part-time to run their households like entrepreneurs do a business.